I like anime. I like it for all the goofy weirdness it’s capable of that wouldn’t be possible in any other medium. Anime has a lot of freedom as a result. One of those freedoms is that it doesn’t have to make sense all the time. It doesn’t have to be perfect all the time either. Some shows are going to be better than others and I learned it’s better to not worry about that.

Y’see, I look at it this way: My bill-paying job has me working with stuff that could kill me or make me wish it did. The kind of stuff that if a couple ounces splashes on someone’s hands or feet, their only chance of survival involves quick use of a tourniquet and a Sawzall. Or the kind of stuff that if breathed in, it basically deep-fries the lungs almost instantly. Or chemicals that don’t get to me right away but will make sure I don’t make it to retirement. Bad fucking shit with no chill. The only way to work with those kinds of chemicals is to NOT lose one’s shit over it. I handle it by being careful and paying attention to what I’m doing so I don’t suffer a miserable death. That’s worked perfectly so far. If I don’t lose my shit over that, then I’m certainly not going to lose my shit over whether an anime turns out to be good or not. To be sure, when I first got into anime, I had a much different mindset and stronger opinions about anime. But that was a long time ago and back then I was also working at a different job, one that wasn’t actively trying to kill me.

Priorities and perspectives, yo.

BetterMan
Those Who Hunt Elves
Najica Blitz Tactics
Compiler
Idol Defense Force Hummingbird
Shamanic Princess
Idol Project
Arcade Gamer Fubuki
Mouse
Mai-chan’s Daily Life

“BetterMan”
26 episodes, 1999
This could have been better, man. It had iffy science, no contrast (I thought something was wrong with my TV at first because almost all of the scenes were in the dark), ad-hoc plot devices, and some of the main characters were unlikeable. There’s also the peak-90s character design, but that’s purely a matter of taste. Given that it came out in the 90s, there are a lot of flaws I’m willing to overlook and forgive. Given that I’ve willingly shoveled far worse anime into my eyes, I have no right to really complain about BetterMan aside from saying that this show tried too hard. I watched this over the course of about a week, about 4 episodes per day. I do not recommend trying to watch all 26 episodes in one marathon unless you have terminal insomnia and an attention span of steel. I think, if I had dropped this after 4-6 episodes, nobody would have blamed me for it. But hope springs eternal and I kept going.

What is it: Supposedly set in the same universe as GaoGaiGar, there are two teenagers with special abilities that allow them to pilot a giant robot. There are weird experiments going on, and some super-human dude who gains powers from eating special seeds.

Getting it: This was released on DVD in the US about 20 years ago and has been out-of-print for almost as long, so downloading was my only option. I suppose I could have bought it off ebay, or scoured the second-hand stores, but it took less than an hour to find and download a torrent of the whole series that was miraculously still seeded. There is a recent import BD set from Japan, if I’m willing to pay $350 and I don’t mind the lack of translation. Naw, I didn’t care for it enough to pay that much. I think by the time I decide I’d actually want that, either I’d be finally able to go back to Japan and find it in their used stores, or a US company would re-license it and put on the shelves here for less than the price of a tank of gas. On a 4K TV, it’s watchable.

“Those Who Hunt Elves”
26 episodes (2 seasons), 1996-97
A fun romp from the 90s. That was a lot more fun than BetterMan. A lot easier to watch too. Whereas it took effort to watch 2-4 episodes of BetterMan per evening, taking over a week, I was able to watch all of TWHE in a weekend. I guess it helps that this anime also has one of my all-time favorite seiyuu.

What is it: Isekai anime. Three people and a tank get transported to a fantasy world. There’s a spell that can send them home, but the elf casting the spell messes it up, there’s an explosion, and parts of the spell fly off and land on other elves. So the main cast has to go around, ripping the clothes off of elves to find the missing parts of the spell.

Getting it: It’s one of those shows that when it was made back in the 90s, it seemed like anyone who had fansubs of it only had the first 6 episodes, leading me to start wondering if maybe that was all there was. In the early 2000s, ADV released this show across a bunch of DVDs. In 2019, Sentai dusted off the old ADV version, and put it on a pair of BD discs (in DVD quality), all 24 episodes, and I bought it for about the price of a tank of gas. On a 4K TV, it’s acceptable.

“Najica Blitz Tactics”
12 episodes, 2001
This is very similar to the classic fanservice anime “Agent Aika” on many levels, including the character design and the endless panty shots. The plot is very shallow, the story was probably written on the back of a bar napkin, and that’s okay. That’s part of the appeal. It all serves as a conveyance for putting panty shots on the screen. That’s this anime’s only real job. It’s not supposed to be mentally demanding. It’s low-effort entertainment. It’s the anime equivalent of a frozen dinner that you take out of the box, put in the microwave for 5 minutes, and then you have something to eat. Whether it’s actually good or not is debatable but anyone who regularly eats microwaved dinners knows what they’re getting into.

There is one actual problem I have with all the panty shots: They’re all the same plain white panties. No variation whatsover. I stopped really noticing them halfway through the show. I mean, add in different colors and styles. Something in black or pink. Add in some lacy flowers or ribbons or a thong or something. Surprise the viewer with a character wearing see-through or going commando. Something. Anything.

What is it: Najica is a spy or agent or something who also works for a perfume company. On the mission in the first episode, she gets a partner that’s sort of human, sort of not. The following missions throughout the rest of the show revolve around finding more of these somewhat-humans. And panty shots. The ending of the series was a typical anime non-ending.

Getting it: Long out of print but can be had via ebay or Amazon or wherever you stumble across used anime. I actually had this on DVD for a long time. Or if you’re stingy/lazy, there’s probably a torrent out there. For something that was released on DVD 15 years ago, the video quality looks surprisingly good on a 4K TV.

“Compiler”
3 episodes, 1994-95
This show doesn’t take itself seriously, and I like that. This show was also from the 90s, a time when nobody really understood computers, much less the idea of how to connect a bunch of computers together. This was a time when a lot of people were still using dialup to connect to BBS (literally someone else’s computer) to get their internet fix. Kia Asamiya’s character designs are very distinct.

What is it: Reverse isekai. Some women from the realm of whatever was considered “cyber” back in the 90s get transported to our world for the purpose of taking it over, only to discover they prefer what our world has to offer and decide to shack up with a couple dudes.

In addition to the anime itself, there was also a 25 minute long collection of music videos, “Music Clips in Trackdown”. It was made a couple years before the anime (1992!), and is best described as a sizzle reel. It showcased some of the original songs both used in and related to the assorted radio dramas, and featured scenes based on the manga. Almost none of those scenes used in these music videos were ever used in the main anime. It was like they were planning to make much more of this beyond a couple OVAs but for whatever reason, didn’t. Which is unfortunate because I would totally watch a full 26 episodes of this. Sadly, I think it’s those same 30 year-old perceptions of computers and internet that made this premise charming is what doomed the entire franchise.

Getting it: Downloading it is your best option. Maybe you can find it streaming on some pirate site. There was theoretically a DVD of this for the US but only in theory. There was an R2-DVD but that’s long out of print. I found it easier to get the LaserDiscs of this. The only confirmed way this was released in the US was on VHS. Maybe you could find that. You know what? Just download it.

“Idol Defense Force Hummingbird”
4 episodes, 1993-95
This mid-90s anime takes 4 episodes to pose the question of whether a group of 5 pilots (all sisters) of experimental fighter jets can also be pop idols, and then answers that question with an optimistic “yes”.

Getting it: Never released in the US, at least not that I know of. There are LaserDiscs out in the wild. Maybe there’s a DVD from Japan. Downloadable fansubs are out there in the wild.

“Shamanic Princess”
6 episodes, 1996-98
How short can we make the skirts? How big can we make the eyes in this short yet odd-paced anime? The last two episodes are actually the start of the story, told in a “here’s how it started” way. Not the weirdest plot jump I’ve ever seen, and I guess in this instance it works. All told, this was kind of trippy. In a good way.

What is it: Tiara is from the Guardian World and she’s looking for a talisman called the Throne of Yord that was stolen by her ex-bf. The Throne of Yord is actually a sentient painting and her friend is stuck inside it. I came into this thinking the source of her shamanic powers was in her twin-drill hair and zettai ryouki that just won’t quit, but I don’t know how shamanic powers work beyond they say fancy words, make fancy gestures, then fancy symbols appear on their bodies and they’re able to do crazy things. And of course, there’s always the old trope of “bad guys with good reasons”.

Getting it: This was originally put on DVD by US Manga Corps back in 2001/03, then went out of print. Media Blasters put it on DVD a few years ago (the version I have). It’s still available here and for fairly cheap, the price range being between “tank of gas” and “fancy cheeseburger combo”. As far as video quality goes, it’s watchable on a 4K TV, if a bit rough. The video artifacts are hard to ignore. This was definitely dragged kicking and screaming out of the analog 90s. Turning 480 lines into 2160 is already a lot of work for my BD player and TV, but this show seems to require more work to make all those extra pixels.

“Idol Project”
4 episodes, 1995-97
Not affiliated at all with the “Love Live Idol Project” franchise. Not one bit.

First of all, I liked this show. I liked it and how utterly bonkers it got. Keep that in mind. This is one of those OVA series that came out gradually, an episode at a time, six months to a year in between. Whenever the hell they felt like it. It’s also based on an H-game of the same name that worked like a prototype IdolMaster. I don’t know what the game was like, so back to the anime. This is it, this was about when they started to really experiment with how big they can make eyes. This is where every “big-eyed anime girl tripping over herself while everything explodes and nothing makes sense” trope came from. This anime, right here, likely conceived in the throes of a raging week-long bender fueled by unlimited cocaine, meth, LSD, and angel dust, is where that all began. And if it isn’t, then it might as well be.

Is this what having a stroke feels like? Asking for me.

What is it: It’s way off in the future and Mimu wants to be an idol and win the Golden Microphone. Weird monsters take her and her friends/mentors/rivals to a different dimension to participate in a game to see who will sing the birth song for their next sun, which dies out every few years. Or maybe it was just a weird dream? I can’t make this up. I lost track after the first two episodes. There’s a lot going on here. Maybe if I had played the game and had some familiarity with it, more of it would make sense. Or not. I suspect I’d only have more questions.

Getting it: Media Blasters still sells it on DVD. They’ve gone to on-demand production for this, where they’ll slap out a handful of DVD-R versions as needed. I guess that’s better than letting it go out of print for anyone late to the party.

I noticed they put 2 episodes on each disc, and they could have probably put all 4 on one disc. Perhaps it’s for the best that it’s on 2 discs. It mercifully forces the viewers to pause and rest after the first 2 episodes, to let them mentally digest what they just saw and prepare for what they’re about to see, as opposed to leaving them on their own while all 4 episodes relentlessly play in one session, building up to a crescendo of madness, with no regard to whether the viewer is ready or not.

“Arcade Gamer Fubuki”
4 episodes, 2002-2003
Ah, another anime about video games. If it looks like Sgt. Frog, that’s because it’s from the same creator. Sure, it’s a cheesy anime, but I never really understood a lot of the outright hate piled on it. Sometimes the best way to enjoy anime is to just shut the brain off.

What is it: Fubuki is good at arcade games, but only when she’s doing a handstand that shows off her Passion Panties. And of course there’s some kind of organization from video game world that wants to take over this world.

One point this show does have, is that if you’re playing video games, you should at least be having fun. Otherwise you’re doing it wrong.

Getting it: It’s a Central Park Media title, so the DVD has been out of print for a long time. But it still shows up for cheap in the second-hand market, which is how I got mine. The DVD itself has a lot of extras packed in.

“Mouse”
12 episodes, 2003
The early 2000s were an interesting time for anime and for a lot of reasons, too many to discuss here. New technologies enabled a lot of experimentation, a lot of throwing ideas at the wall to see what sticks, to see what they can get away with. Apparently Mouse was an experiment to see if they could make a borderline-hentai version of Lupin III. I’m convinced this really wanted to be a hentai. I know because I’ve seen enough hentai in my day, and this has a lot of traits of hentai. The art style, the indifference to plot holes, the disregard for continuity, the boob physics, it’s all there. All that’s missing is the overt on-screen sex, and they get as close as they can to that. But hey, if the higher-ups say “you can’t make this into a hentai”, you work with what you got, y’know?

This is from Satoru Akahori, the same guy who gave us “Bakuen Campus Guardress”, “Sorcerer Hunters”, “Abenobashi”, and “Saber Marionette”. You know what? I think I like this guy.

What is it: Sorata Muon is a meek art teacher by day, master thief by night, just like the 20 previous generations of his family. His three assistants are hot and curvy women (and fellow teachers), of course. Everyone else not in on it must be dumber than a pile of rocks to not notice they barely hide their identities. I mean, if Inspector Zenigata paid a visit from the Lupin III franchise, he would have figured out everyone’s true identity in a matter of seconds. Even Inspector Clouseau could have figured it out. It’s better to not really think about that, though. Remember, this show runs on hentai logic. If you can muster up the suspension of disbelief, then you should be okay.

There are 12 episodes, each only 15 minutes long, The main story wraps up in the 11th. The last episode exists purely for comedy’s sake and has a character voiced by Haruko Momoi whose main purpose is to smash a few holes in the Fourth Wall. I’ve always liked Momoi. Speaking of Momoi, Under17 did the opening and ending theme songs.

Getting it: Media Blasters has it on their Anime Works label, and it’s still available as DVD-R on-demand. Used copies are also somewhat easy to find.

“Mai-chan’s Daily Life”
1-hour movie, 2014
Not an anime, but a recent live-action movie loosely based on the ultra-violent manga of the same name. It’s quite toned down from the original source material. Instead of the porn and violence, now it’s just violence.

What is it: This is about Mai-chan, a slave maid who cannot die, no matter how badly she’s injured or how horribly she’s mistreated. It’s well established that immortality has its pitfalls and drawbacks, and being physically abused regularly is another drawback to immortality.

Getting it: While I couldn’t find it via streaming or download, finding the physical US-licensed BD of it was absurdly easy to the point of baffling. Walmart, Target, BestBuy, Amazon, Barnes&Noble, Books-a-Million, FYE, DVDEmpire, all of the major retailers that sold movies, had the English-subtitled BD and R1-DVD in stock online for about $20 or so. (Weirdly enough, I didn’t find it on RightStuf/BuyAnime.) Just a little too niche for the big-box stores to directly put on the shelves, I guess. A few mouse clicks, a couple days’ wait, and it appeared in my mailbox.

Initially I was wondering why this movie was so readily available, given that it’s based on a manga with extreme violent and graphic sexual content, and the manga itself isn’t officially licensed in the US (and probably never will be, unless by a very brave publisher). But in the movie there were no real sex scenes; at most some nudity here and there, leaving just plain old violence and lots of it. And that’s the key to its widespread availability in the US. Violence is fine by our hypocritical American double standards while sex isn’t. Show someone’s guts getting ripped out and heads exploding and someone getting shot and so on and all the blood that spills with it, and you can sell movies with that all day long. Hell, we’ve been making cartoons with that for decades. Daffy Duck has taken shotgun blasts to the face, Wile E. Coyote is either blowing himself up with dynamite or getting hit by a train, and it’s considered clean and wholesome entertainment. But don’t you dare even imply anything going into a vagina. “Mai-chan’s Daily Life: The Movie” exploits that loophole here.

In something of a Space Ghost move, the original author turned the character Mai into a Vtuber and made a Twitter account. Also, included with the movie, is a 30-minute long omake where the only thing that gets mutilated is the Fourth Wall. That’s the world we live in now. I guess the point of doing that is, nobody should get worked up over fictional characters. Mai-chan can get cut up with a chainsaw in one scene, and with the stroke of a pen (or stylus), she can be back to normal in the next.

Anyway, that wraps up this batch. Let’s see what the next month or two holds.